I've just pulled a double all nighter. Unlike in the late nineties this wasn't all sex, drugs, rock and roll; more snot, baby crack and screaming. You I'm exhausted. In all honesty, exhausted doesn't even begin to cover it. Before my toddler became ill with a run of the mill viral infection, I… Continue reading Hitting the wall
I cried for most of Friday. I awoke to a Great Britain I didn't recognise, one that I never saw coming and that scared me. We voted to leave the EU and redefine our position in the world. My timeline went mad. I am mostly surrounded by other 'bleeding heart liberals' so mainly saw shock… Continue reading Taking the power back
I became single last year. It was both terrifying and liberating. I'd been on my own for long periods before and that alone didn't scare me. There just seemed to be so many mountains to climb; juggling all the kids, my health, both physical and mental. I had no room for anyone else, and who… Continue reading If you fall in love with me…..
I have always been someone who feels empathy; I struggle to hide or control my emotions, and don't generally see this as a negative thing. I wear my heart proudly on my sleeve- if I'm sad you will see it in my eyes, and I've been told my joy is infectious. It baffles me when… Continue reading Love beats hate
I'm sat here broken and sobbing. I just had one of the most humiliating experiences a person can have, and the worst part? It won't be the last time. It's a sunny Tuesday afternoon. I've just had my hair done for the first time in a year; my boyfriend arrives tomorrow and we are off… Continue reading There’s f**k all wrong with her
I've been debating for a while where I'm going with this. The cold, hard truth of the matter is that I've had very little time for anything other than being mum, and trying to keep my body working as best it can. I can't remember the last time I was able to read a paper,… Continue reading Lessons I have learned
Life is tough enough without a chronic illness, but throw constant pain and exhaustion into the mix and make no mistake, you have a war on your hands. You find yourself conscripted for constant combat overnight; a never ending series of minor and major battles. You can not win them all, your mission must firstly… Continue reading The 7 deadly sins of chronic illness and how to combat them
It's a new year, and the beginning of a new chapter for me. Single, pushing forty, mother of four, chronically ill. To say the concept of that version of 'me' was daunting is an understatement. It's not the dream to have four kids with two different fathers and be in the position I am currently… Continue reading Shifting sands
I've realised lately that I'm a stubborn old goat. I've been barely holding it together, but for some reason I find it almost impossible to ask for help. I've been thinking a lot about why this is, and I've settled on the fact that I don't want to appear needy, or lose my independence by… Continue reading My own biggest critic
I'm in a time of huge change and turmoil. The pursuit of happiness has led me down a path that is new, terrifying and forcing me to really look at all elements of my life and health. Chronic illness in its essence is a scary, limiting thing, and it's very easy to become too afraid… Continue reading Writing the next chapter
You've gotta have Gumption.... 