Damn. Another year, another tough winter. I’m sure I must have been a bear or a hedgehog, or something possibly less tough in a former life. This morning came another day dragging my sore body out of bed, feeling sick, taking meds whilst continuing to do all that’s demanded of me on a daily basis.… Continue reading Is it almost over yet?
I don't know how I keep managing this, but yet again I find myself in a turmoltous period of time. The kids have been off for a couple of weeks and we have been blessed with good weather and physical ability on my part, that has allowed us to go on some wonderful adventures together.… Continue reading All change
Finding Hope, when all seems lost.
I've been feeling absolutely pants this week. Worse than I have for a while and it's already been a crappy winter. Then out of the blue I get an email from my editor at themighty.com telling me another editor from babble.com wants to publish one of my articles. Sometimes I think the universe is trying… Continue reading Finding Hope, when all seems lost.
Should I stay or should I go?
I've been feeling pretty crappy lately. It's winter and the short days of cold, windy rain are taking their toll on my body. I hurt. I'm sad. I'm ready for a break from the relentless pain and monotony of feeling terrible. Of course I don't dare say that out loud. I don't show that part… Continue reading Should I stay or should I go?
When you look but don’t see
The hardest part of dealing with chronic illness has and will always be other people. Stupid right? It's not the pain or the sleepless nights. It's not the constant hospital trips and treatments. It's not the sickness and sadness that the life you thought you had, you have now lost. All of those things are… Continue reading When you look but don’t see
Inside the mind of someone chronically ill at night
I'm lonely. I'm going to die too soon. I must write a will. I hope I don't give my children my illness. I'm a terrible mother and a failure. How am I going to get everyone to school tomorrow? I hurt. I wish I didn't hurt. Damn it I forgot to put the washing on.… Continue reading Inside the mind of someone chronically ill at night
Hitting the wall
I've just pulled a double all nighter. Unlike in the late nineties this wasn't all sex, drugs, rock and roll; more snot, baby crack and screaming. You I'm exhausted. In all honesty, exhausted doesn't even begin to cover it. Before my toddler became ill with a run of the mill viral infection, I… Continue reading Hitting the wall
If you fall in love with me…..
I became single last year. It was both terrifying and liberating. I'd been on my own for long periods before and that alone didn't scare me. There just seemed to be so many mountains to climb; juggling all the kids, my health, both physical and mental. I had no room for anyone else, and who… Continue reading If you fall in love with me…..
Love beats hate
I have always been someone who feels empathy; I struggle to hide or control my emotions, and don't generally see this as a negative thing. I wear my heart proudly on my sleeve- if I'm sad you will see it in my eyes, and I've been told my joy is infectious. It baffles me when… Continue reading Love beats hate
There’s f**k all wrong with her
I'm sat here broken and sobbing. I just had one of the most humiliating experiences a person can have, and the worst part? It won't be the last time. It's a sunny Tuesday afternoon. I've just had my hair done for the first time in a year; my boyfriend arrives tomorrow and we are off… Continue reading There’s f**k all wrong with her