It's a tricky thing to embrace being off work long-term. I'm sure people think, that would be amazing, but the reality is quite different: it’s lonely and tedious, obsessing over every nuance of your health. Every. Single. Day. Life was previously so full of things that gave me meaning, my job, my role as a… Continue reading Redemptive stories
I can't even begin to explain the changes and upheavals my little family has gone through in the last few weeks. I planned my family so spectacularly brilliantly, that multiple major life events crashed their way through September one after another, like the worst kind of new rollercoaster built to challenge all your senses at… Continue reading Loving yourself when life gets tough
I have been quiet for a while. As most of you know this tends to be because i am out living life as much as i can, going on adventures and challenging myself. Whilst this is true, on this occasion its also because i have been exhausted. Too exhausted to sit in front of my… Continue reading One foot in front of the other
I'm lonely. I'm going to die too soon. I must write a will. I hope I don't give my children my illness. I'm a terrible mother and a failure. How am I going to get everyone to school tomorrow? I hurt. I wish I didn't hurt. Damn it I forgot to put the washing on.… Continue reading Inside the mind of someone chronically ill at night
I've been debating for a while where I'm going with this. The cold, hard truth of the matter is that I've had very little time for anything other than being mum, and trying to keep my body working as best it can. I can't remember the last time I was able to read a paper,… Continue reading Lessons I have learned
I'm learning to love myself again. All the flaws and idiocincracies that add up to me. Loud, bossy and incessantly talking. Quiet, reflective and sensitive. I have a huge issue with being boxed into a single character type, and person. Those that know me well, will confirm that in company I'm great at finding the… Continue reading Musical memories, and the artists that saved us.
It's a new year, and the beginning of a new chapter for me. Single, pushing forty, mother of four, chronically ill. To say the concept of that version of 'me' was daunting is an understatement. It's not the dream to have four kids with two different fathers and be in the position I am currently… Continue reading Shifting sands